B&C Meats

Music by J. Byrd Fuddly

Lyrics by J. Byrd Fuddly & Myrtle Turtle


VERSE ONE

Well I was elbow deep in snapper, but I continued to cast my line / It was a smallmouth celebration, and the Byrd was flying high / But then I felt that funny feeling, and it knocked me to my knees


She had crabs in her trap and they were threatening my B&C


VERSE TWO

I took a new gal out to night putt, so we could have ourselves some fun / Tried to make my move on her back nine first thing on number one / I was trying to nail her putter, got both balls racked indeed


I tore my BVD's to make room for my B&C 


VERSE THREE

Well down at muscle beach those boys they pump each other tough / So I asked them for a pointer, on how to make my muscle buff / Well hearing about them supplements sounds like alphabet soup to me


I'll stick with vitamin D to bulk up my B&C


VERSE FOUR

I kept my best cheese in nature's pocket, so I always knew where it was at / Until I went looking for a pet store, so I could buy myself a cat / I stepped up to the counter, told 'em exactly what I need:


"I've got a gerbil in my jockstrap and it's nibblin' on my B&C"


VERSE FIVE

Well, I took you out for bangers and mash, but you still weren't satisfied / You're cravin' the kind of sausage that money just can't buy / So if you still feel hungry, baby unlock the back door for me


You've got the greatest gravy when we mix it with my B&C


VERSE SIX

Next mornin' I hit the drugstore, cause I needed some special cream / My junk was red and itchy, and it made me wanna scream / The old man took a look and said "Where'd you pick up that disease?"


"She slopped her yeast on my biscuits and it soured my B&C"


VERSE SEVEN

I know you live uptown now, but even good girls can get the blues / You traded our orgasms for a closet full of shoes / So when you need a fat frank, just go downtown and see


I've got a hot dog stand where I rent out my B&C


Double order of clams with a side of B&C